Getting Personal

What do I have to be thankful for?

Thanksgiving Day, 2008.

23 years old. Married just over a year. 11 month old baby boy.

I sat up anxiously all night long. A knot so big in the pit of my stomach I thought an alien may leap out at any moment. Today was the day. FINALLY.

I'd waited 11 long months for the call. Counting the days, the hours, the minutes. Knowing an approximate time frame but nothing for certain. Not til the call came in.  

It's a strange feeling to have half of your heart missing. To have so much love, but feel so empty all at the same time. I knew the feeling all to well. Too many goodbyes. Too many tears soaked into his pillow, washing away his scent after so long.  It's funny, too, to live in a house you want so badly to call home, but it just doesn't seem to be an appropriate name. After all, home is where your heart is, right? Well then how could it be home, when my heart was so far away? 

I checked on my sweet sleeping boy at least 20 times that night. Did he know? Could he sense the magnitude of what the day held? Surely not. I hope not. But, at the same time, I hope so. It's important, after all.  I remember sitting next to his crib, brushing his hair back with my finger and whispering "One day, sweet Prince, I will tell you the story of love. Love that travels so far you think it may be lost forever. But true love always finds its way home."  

It ALWAYS finds its way home.

It was bitter cold that Thanksgiving Day. I was over dressed in a heavy sweater. I was so concerned about what I should wear. Looking back now, I see I failed miserably. But that's neither her nor there, now is it?   I lightly nibbled on my Thanksgiving lunch, watching the clock and checking my phone more than anything else. I was the strangest combination of nervous and excited. I couldn't decide if I wanted to laugh with glee or cry hysterically.

It was nearly a two hour drive to the hangar that bitter cold day. At that time, Stout Field was new and different to me. I still felt new to this life, thrown in the deep end without a life jacket. "Swim."  The guards pointed us in the appropriate directions. We found the large hangar and made our way inside, finding a lucky spot right in the front, facing directly at the large door at the opposite end.  Then we waited for what seemed like days. (In reality, it was around 3-4 hours) No one knew a definite time. But we would soon.

My phone rang. 

"We're on the buses." He said. 4 years later I still hear the words, strained thru the hum of busy voices in the echoing hangar. A lump rose in my throat. It was real. Finally. It was real.

After another brief wait, we heard a force of motorcycles approach. The Freedom Riders. I have the utmost respect for this amazing group. They stand with families like mine in the happiest and the saddest of times. They are true patriots in every sense of the word.   The walked into the hangar and lined the entry way for the first 10 or 15 feet. It was at this moment that it occurred to me:

THEY'RE GOING TO MARCH RIGHT IN AT ME.

My heart beat so fast in my chest I thought I may die before I even got to see his face. Dayson looked around confused by the vast range of emotions sweeping over the crowd. I held him tight, thankful for my small piece of Heaven who had kept me strong with tiny hands those past months. And then the large door opened.

 In front of that door stood what seemed like the entire Indiana Army National Guard, and in they marched, straight to me. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't speak. All I could do was cry. All the pain and sorrow and utter loneliness I'd felt over the last 11 months poured out of me. He was home. Mine at last. 

It seemed like that march took hours. The world spun slowly as I searched the crowd of uniformed soldiers for his face.  I recognized so many faces. They stopped within 3 feet of me. It was all I could do to will myself to be still, to not plow thru the soldiers to find my own. "Wait for him. He will find you." I thought. "Love always finds it's way home."   And he did. I swear, as the crowd parted and he stepped thru, the world stopped and angels sang. Ever wish and prayer I'd pleaded so earnestly in the darkest of hours was answered in that moment. There he was. Real flesh and blood. No computer screen, no skype, no broken telephone call. Him. My Hero. 

We were together at last, my red puffy eyes, his handsome face, and our sweet baby boy. My family. My heart had returned to me and I felt alive again. 

So you ask me what I have to be thankful for?   I am thankful for that Thanksgiving Day, and every one since then, that I have been able to hold My Soldier's hand and hear his voice, real and clear, right next me. That's a privilege many don't have this Holiday.  I'm thankful for every day with him until our next Mission arises. 

May you and your family enjoy a Blessed and Happy Thanksgiving.

Take a Moment to Thank our service men and women for all that they do, sacrificing daily and going with so little so that we can have so much.  

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!

We're Goin' On a Dino Hunt!

I love my job.  Have I mentioned that before?

I work with kids. A LOT of kids. Which, as the mother of a grand total of FIVE charming little devils, this really isn't something I'm unaccustomed to. It doesn't really phase me. Trust me when I say this, you, the Client Mommy, are MUCH more concerned about how your child is behaving than I am.  When on location, or in the studio, with a child client or even a small family, I live by one simple rule: 

LET KIDS BE KIDS.   

When you try and force a child into a behavior they're not really down for, you're much more likely to get a riled up child as a result.  Studio sessions aren't ALWAYS easy. They come into a strange place, meet a strange person with a big funny looking camera thing-a-majig who's moving them here and there, making silly faces, talking in weird voices, and overall just trying to get their attention. They're not going to be super comfortable right off the bat.  I'm not afraid to look/sound/act silly to get a good reaction from your pint sized cutie. 

Outdoors are often easier. Well, theoretically. 

The key to a successful outdoor shoot with a little one is to make them think they're in charge. Where do you want to go? What do you want to see? This week, I went on a Dino Adventure with a Tiny Little Man. The results were FANTABULOUS.

(This is tiny Dino Explorer Mr. D and his Momma, practicing their Dino Moves!)

We scouted for baby dinosaur eggs, checked out trees that a BIG dino had knocked over with his tail, and even saw some foot prints!! It's amazing how easily great photo opportunities come along when you let things just happen :) So Momma's take a tip from me, don't get worked up. I promise you, even when you think there's not a chance we'll get cooperation, there will be moments captured that you won't soon forget!

That Will NEVER Be My Kid!

I had a fabulous shoot this week with the sweetest little family and most adorable 1 year old boy ever! Over the course of this shoot, the mother and I chatted about a few things, mostly Mommy related. Toward the end, the topic of behavior was brought up. We discussed how we always swore we would never have one of "THOSE" kids. You know the type. The screaming in Wal-Mart kind. The running around like a monkey kind. The kind that seem absolutely unaware of anyone else's presence.  But, alas, I have one.  

SO many parents come to my sessions worried that their child won't cooperate.  

Let me say this once, for all you Mommies to hear.   

DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT!

Sessions with young kids are often the most time consuming, but they're also the most fulfilling. It's those moments that you think you're little one is being "awful" that often turn out to make the sweetest pictures!

Take this one, for example:

My sweet little client was so very tired by the end of our session, after naturally refusing to nap for Momma. He very matter-of-factly sat down in the grass and proceeded to work up a crank. And then I caught the sweetest little pout ever.  And you know what? After I took it, Momma said "I'm so glad you got that! I've always wanted a picture of his pouty face!"

See what I mean? Sometimes, it's best to just let the kiddos do their thing. They'll show us the beauty they have to share for your images in their time. No need to force it! 

And trust me when I say "This is nothing compared to how my kids act." 

I recently had a make up session at one of my favorite local locations, and happened to have Joey with me. So, I took advantage once my client's session was over and attempted to snap some images of my pretty princess. 

Our little mini session promptly went from these:

To these:

All in a matter of 5 minutes or less. 

So I truly do know how you feel and where you're coming from.

Relax. Let them be kids. The outcome will be worth it :)